The What-Ifs in Life

Funny how when it comes to dealing with anything blood or emergency, I am the first one to respond to the call. Sometimes I wonder whether my stint in this frontline service industry is just my second-best choice meant to cover up my actual desire to serve others in a hospital or an emergency kind of environment. After all, I didn’t work hard enough during my “O” Levels and I have no one but myself to be blamed. I needed sterling results to enrol into a top Junior College so that I can study medicine at NUS but back then, I didn’t have much drive to want to excel.

Back then, my motto was just to have fun 365 days a year. It took me a long while before I realised how far behind I am when it comes to achieving my dream and by then, the opportunity has already gone off with the wind just like always. People say, golden opportunities knock only once in your lifetime and sadly, I was too blinded by silver that I forgot the golden pot hidden behind every rainbow.

So I told myself, just try out this service industry where our lives revolve around making others happy by serving up sizeable portions of food and service from the heart. It is definitely a different kind of “service” as compared to the medical industry but it is somewhat similar isn’t it? But there are times whereby I feel that what satisfaction I get isn’t up to the level I was yearning to feel.

If I really let my mind wander, I always wondered what it’s like to be donning the white lab coat and having a stethoscope hung loosely around my neck. But other times, I slap myself for thinking too much about the what-ifs in life. I’m not saying I don’t treasure my time in the service industry. I do, it fact starting out from SHATEC Institutes and garnering that elusive scholarship gave me a sense of redemption of sorts. But considering the fact that I don’t freak out when I’m faced with blood and road accidents; it should mean something shouldn’t it? I don’t need a show-stopping career move; maybe just something that will make me feel that my mission in life is actually on the road of fulfilment.

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