Sometimes I have to admit I tend to get carried away when I write. I guess maybe when the mood sets it, the right music is on the airwaves, I can actually write enough to cause the readers to feel the pain I feel when I write. Funny, I think I should be a writer so at least even if my speech doesn’t move people to tears, my words can make people cry. But yeah, writing has always been my outlet of releasing the negativity that I am amazed I actually was able to last through the difficult October month without writing a single thing even though it was like the worst month of 2011, and even, my entire life.
Yesterday was no different. I guess the air was full of melancholy that I feel the need to let go of all the negativity I had into one post titled Borrowed Time. But writing itself wasn’t enough, I had to read it to someone to ensure my words turn out right so I ended up reading it to Sunshine. I have no idea what was the actual impact he felt when I read it to him in the middle of the night when he was supposed to be fast asleep but he still listened no less and although the post is tad depressing, I am quite happy I get to read it to someone at the very least.
Then it dawned on me that should I want him to understand me and my 1001 personalities, I ought to give him access to this site so with all the courage I didn’t muster towards allowing Hubs & Hairi to gain access to LBV, I gave all the courage I had to Sunshine.
I don’t expect you to read it religiously but if you do wind up reading in-between lectures or when you are on mobile, I sincerely hope it gives you a deeper glimpse into the side of me that only a special few are able to gain access to. I’m not the easiest of people to understand but if you take your time to understand me, you’ll be able to reap the rewards. I’m like an onion, I have many layers to my inner soul but that isn’t to say all is good. I am nothing more than a human with many, many flaws that even the naked eye can see. Some parts of me are bad and it’s up to you how you want to deal with them but however you want to deal with the bad side of me, I hope and prayer to the Almighty that you’ll never stop trying.
Welcome to my tiny online world,
my humble abode,
my solace when the world gets too hard,
my recipe to keep my sanity intact,
my sweet surrender,
my secret passage to a world where I run away from reality,
my great escape from Reality Avenue.
My life isn’t easy but I hope should one day when I leave the world, you’ll be able to look back into this site and remember me as one of those people who’s left an impact on your life, hopefully in a good way.
With much love,