The IT Book For Me

Sales is never my forte and that is also the reason why I feel that I am lacking confidence in negotiations. However, I feel that this is a fabulous book to own and I hope the local bookstores here have it lest I ship it in via Amazon over the next few weeks.

Negotiation Genius



9491th Day.

As my birthday concluded last night, I sneaked a chance today to reflect on things since I was busting the calories at the gym today. I can’t be more grateful to be 26 now that I am where I am and surrounded by the people who truly mattered. I know it hadn’t been an easy journey to turn 26, in fact I never envisioned living past 25 as I thought it is funny to plan for a life I am not sure of.

But God has been ever so Forgiving and I am thankful to wake up and be blessed enough to savor another day  with the family and the ones that matter the most to me.

The last two days had been a wonderful experience. In fact, it had been the best and definitely most memorable experience of a birthday well-spent. The only glitch? That four of my closest loves could not attend my birthday dinner with me.


One, Dad.

It is my first birthday without Papa and as much as I am glad that he no longer is in pain, missing him is undeniable. I am sure Mama had it harder than I do but the feeling of losing never seemed to go away does it? There are days I will stare hard at his portrait on my table and tell him that I miss seeing him smile. That sometimes seeing a photo of him smiling wide isn’t enough to make me miss him any lesser. I am not the most religious of Muslims but I do save a prayer for you as much as I can as you totally deserve it Daddy dear. I know you are watching me every step of the day as my guardian angel and I know that is comforting as I know I am safe in your protection in the eyes of God.

Two, Murugiah Komala.

The best friend is down with the sniffles and is out of action the last few days. Babe! Feel better soon please! I am craving for The Pizza Place dinner with you 🙂

Three, Maris Stella Djuli.

The other best friend who is in town with her gorgeous son BUT we can’t seemed to find the proper time and day to meet up for ngabuburit. 😦 See you soon my dear! Hopefully I can sneak back to Jakarta some time end of the year or early next year to see you and finally try out your home-cooking! 🙂

Four, Reaus.

I know this year had been a tough one for you with your Mum’s passing and in the deepest corners of my heart, I yearn to be close to you as before. However, I can only hope and wish for that to happen as our friendship is not one that is taken easily by your partner and I am deeply saddened to have to consider staying away so long as he remains your partner. I missed those days that we will call and catch up with each other over anything and everything under the sun and just laugh the moments away. I fondly remembered sneaking to WCP to surprise you one fine night and drop off a cake for you and your colleagues at work. I tell the love how sad it is like to watch a friendship disintegrate slowly but I do believe that perhaps some friendships can’t blossom due to reasons only God will know. I do have you in my prayers everyday. I pray that you will always remain safe in God’s protection and that you will continue to be strong when the going gets tough.


I used to grow up regretting why certain things don’t end the way that I want to. But as I  blew my 26th candle yesterday, I resolute to never regret those missed chances and failed attempts. I strive to live a greater life everyday and to seize whatever opportunities I have every day to make my day better and happier for myself and those that matter around me. I believe God has His reasons, we just need to live through those bad decisions and make better ones for the greater future. 🙂

Embracing 26.


The day has finally arrived that I have turned a year older and hopefully, wiser. In the spirit of the birthday festivities happening today, allow me the grace to share with you a wonderful article about turning 25 and discovering some things that fascinate and inspire a man to greater heights.

25 Things that I Learnt About Myself at 25

I am off to a roaring start to the day and I wish everyone will have an equally blast of a weekend too!

A Birthday Letter from Yesteryear

I was purging out old letters from my mailbox and I chanced upon this birthday letter sent by an old suitor (a good few years back) who by far has the most moving words I can only imagine. Wherever you are, I wish you all the kindest the world has to offer you dear one.


Dear Madam,                                                                                                        July 4, 2011

I most sincerely wish not to have embarrassed you as such before but I must have

your attention drawn. My feelings will not be suppressed nor will they be laughed at.

I assure you Madam, that I will bow and take my leave with much unsupported

willingness immediately, after I see you open this humbled letter.


I see I am not a gentleman of your exquisite taste nor am I a man worth your time but I

am a man honest with himself. I will not stand by and watch you walk away with accusing

me as a horrible fiend when you believe the lie as the truth. I know not how your community

see me as, nor do I care for what they see in me. Your opinions of my conceitedness and

arrogance is by far the greatest flaws I see in me. I cannot thank you more for pointing that

ugly truth of my imperfection to me. However much I hate that side, I cannot simply discard

them for they are what that makes me human.


If I may be so bold as to ask for your hand a second time, will you grace me a desirable

answer or would you turn your head in scorn? However, worry no Madam for I will never

ask again. You have my word. I have never felt this way about a woman nor have I felt such

strong feelings since the massacre of my family. I am a beast that  was shaped from the

cruelties of life and the sneering scornful community of the ton. Oh yes, a beast! A fiend! A

horrible arrogant man! That’s who and what I am or so the society believe. Now, believe as

you like for I have defended my honor to my best capabilities.


You however, are a beauty to behold. A blossoming rose in a garden of thorns. Graceful

and beautiful… Grace and femininity, you symbolize them perfectly. No, I do not flatter nor

do I praise but I speak the truth as I see it.


Forgive me if I have been brash and foul in this letter but I know not the flowery language

to woo you well. I am not a man of communication nor am I a man of such eloquence. I

understand your fury for having been proposed by such un-mannered man.


But I pray and wish you the best in life for perhaps you will meet a man of your taste. A man

of your fairy tale, a prince charming, who commands grace and eloquence unlike me who

commands the silent thunder, power and loyalty.


God bless you in good health.


I bid you adieu, Madam. Goodbye forever.



Oz for 26th!

I have been a fervent fan of Oz stuffs for as long as I can remember but I can hardly get them shipped over due to customs’ regulations! However, I have checked these wonderful Australian brands can ship to Singapore and two of them have books available online for order. What’s not to love about Australia? I am crazy enough to try their GSD & detox tea which was created by a Naturopath who can’t be more smarter and crazy-hot than him!

(I thank the Good Lord for such wonderful souls who look so absolutely smashing that his smile is enough to make me convert to being a big-time tea lover.  He does loads of good things for everyone too!)

Now, any kind sponsors out there? My birthday is just round the corner!





SumT Detox


Useful sites to refer to are:

WEEK 3: Self Love & Worthiness

Day 13:

What are 3 of your “victories” or successes in life? 

We often look at how far we have to go, and forget to see how far we’ve come.

Take this day to remember all the times you kicked a** and took names, acknowledge yourself for them, and resolve to toot your horn a little more.

You truly are a powerful, creative person, capable of creating any reality you want!

So … let’s hear it!

 Sweet Victory

VICTORY #1: Walking away from a physically demeaning relationship with a long-term ex-boyfriend. It had to be the hardest but boldest step I have ever taken to consider walking away from that relationship as on the plus point, he had such a lovely family to boot and such luxurious lifestyle that I can only imagine. But over the course of the relationship, I began to realize that all that luxury did not fulfill my idea of happiness so I walked away. Best decision I have ever made in my life. EVER. 🙂

VICTORY #2: Winning the SHATEC Scholarship beating out 40 others and maintaining my GPA above 3.3 till I completed my diploma studies. It was a big victory as I managed to make myself proud as I proved my mettle against the detractors who think I couldn’t make it. Yes, my chosen path isn’t a bed of roses BUT it couldn’t have been more exciting than this. I chose a path away from the norm and caved out a career in a quick-serving corporation and that brought me endless opportunities to grow and evolve into a greater person than before. 🙂

VICTORY #3: Being financially-independent since 15. It wasn’t an easy feat considering that I made that decision hastily on my 15th birthday but a decade on, I never gave up on trying to prove to myself and those around me that I am capable to bring in the moolah even when the circumstances are against me. At an age when other kids are busily spending their pocket money on country flag erasers and whatnots, I was busy saving up to have a fat bank account to the extent that Mum used to call me stingy as I don’t mind others forking out cash for me instead of me forking it out for myself. Haha! I am proud of myself for being that stubborn to want to show myself and my family what I am capable of AND still be happy to give more to others where necessary. 🙂

I know I can achieve more, so long as I set my mind to it.
You just have to wait and see.

WEEK 3: Self Love & Worthiness

Day 11:

Forgiveness. It’s time to start forgiving yourself for mistakes you’ve made, ‘wrong’ decisions you’ve taken and ‘right’ ones you haven’t. If you want to be happy and more energetic, you’ve got to DUMP the baggage you’re carrying around!

Lighten the load on your back, neck, shoulders and heart as you let go of anything that’s not serving you. It doesn’t belong in your bright, gorgeous, happy and fulfilling life 🙂

What will you forgive yourself for and move on from today? 

Be gentle with yourself – this is NOT an invitation to beat yourself up, it’s an invitation to free yourself. Confidence comes from seeing mistakes and failures as a part of life, and not making them mean something negative about *you* as a person.

I’m excited to see what you’re saying goodbye to so please do share 🙂


There are definitely many mistakes that I have made throughout the course of the twenty over years of my life and most of them led me to where I am now.  Among those mistakes that I have made, they have to revolve around my wrong choices in choosing a partner or what my girlfriends call it, Mr Right Now.

I had a tumultuous and tempestuous long-term relationship with a schoolmate which ended acrimoniously during my graduation and that had definitely left the greatest impact in my life thus far. It has taught me not to trust others too easily and to never give 100% of my time and effort to one man only until he is the one with whom I will call my husband.

Alas, I am a trusting person. I trust others truly easily so it’s little wonder that I never seemed to learn from that painful chapter in my life. I had sudden but brief exposures to suicide, abuse and also betrayal that I never thought I would actually come out of the chapter alive and virtually unscathed. Thankfully, I have been blessed with a tight knit of friends who have seen me in my biggest ups and greatest downfalls and are not afraid to help me up when the going gets tough.

Many, many failed relationships later, I vowed not to love another man anymore as I fear that another heartbreak will crucify my sanity but I guess my current love managed to overcome that aspect of me. With him (as how I was with my previous ex-boyfriends), I was completely transparent with my past. I told him all the nasty things I have done, all the rebellion inside of me that’s hungry to be set free and also, the hope that by being honest, he would be able to accept me with all of my imperfections. He remained quiet throughout the bouts of episodes that I throw tantrums and confided my deepest secrets. Not once did he questioned my reasons for doing what I did. In fact, he never raised his voice at me. I thought that was weird as I was used to being hurled abuse by the ex-boyfriend that it took a long time to understand that…

It’s okay not to hurt another person verbally or physically. It is the right thing to not lay a hand on anyone. Inflicting pain on another person is downright wrong.

I thought our relationship was destined to doom eventually but… Close to four years of friendship and three years of love later, he still tells me everyday that he loves me unconditionally and that regardless of what mistakes I have done in the past as it doesn’t matter to him. What matters to him is the current me and the future me that he wants to plan a future with. I guess that is where the forgiveness came from.

I learnt to forgive when I was shown the right to forgive myself in the eyes of another and to me, that is the greatest gift I can ask from anyone for myself. Forgiveness for myself is a healing experience. It was a long, long time coming but I am glad I opened myself up to this healing process. It is as though all the negativity and disappointment perish to make way to something greater than holding back. Since my birthday is coming in a few days,  I am going on another path to forgive my past 25 years of mistakes that I have yet to find the time to forgive and heal.

I hope you readers will feel the power that forgiveness has on you.
It truly feels like a miracle.
Good vibes everyday everyone!


One Act I am Dying to Watch: Le Noir

Le Noir

They have been in Singapore for their debut show in March and only recently came back for a second season earlier this month. I know the love does not appreciate arts and music the way that I do but I truly, truly, truly wish my best friend, Ms Maris Stella Djuli is back in Singapore as I am very confident she will share the same sentiment as I do towards cultured art. The second show ends on June 29th and that’s like a good two days away! I can only salivate and go gooey-eyed over the stills and short clips but I can guarantee that nothing  can beat the true experience of sitting in the theater and experiencing the full magic of a live show.


Le Noir 1

Le Noir 2

Le Noir 3

Le Noir 4

Oh Le Noir, if only I can get a little rendezvous with you.

PS: Watch the video and be astounded by their magic!

7 for 26!

I am always excited when my birthday is coming not because I will get presents galore (heck I am like frigging 26!) but mainly because I have more reasons and a large-enough pocket to splurge myself silly with a bagful of things. However, that isn’t to say that a little help from the ones around me to help fulfill my wishlist isn’t welcomed. Heh heh! Here’s a list of my wants but they are not arranged in order of importance. They are mostly arranged in the order of random wants that have been at the back of my mind since I turned 25 around 300 odd days ago! So happy searching for my presents and yes, surprise me!




Dot by March Jacobs

I have been captivated by the lightness of the top notes from the perfume since the days when I was wearing Katy Perry’s Purr perfume but I took a very long time to consider getting it as it was mad expensive in comparison for a 100ml bottle. The perfume contains Red Berries, Dragonfruit, Honeysuckle, Jasmine, Coconut Water, Orange Blossom, Vanilla, Driftwood, Musk and I am especially drawn to anything fruity with a light tinge of youthfulness. If Dot is too expensive, here’s the alternative:


Girlfriend by Justin Beiber

Ignoring the face behind the perfume, Girlfriend is a tad bit similar to Dot but wins only because it has an extra ingredient in its top note; which happens to be my favorite fruit of all time!  The top note provides an exciting splash of mandarin, blackberry, pear and strawberry. The heart (middle note) is marked as “Dream” and includes accords of pink freesia, star jasmine, apricot and orange blossom. The base is a “Kiss”, containing sensual notes of vanilla orchid, luminous musk and white amber. What’s not to love when it is my favorite fruit? 🙂


Kindle by Amazon

I have an undying love for books and although I love the smell of a good paperback, this e-reader is changing my perception of technology as I am seeing Kindle quite frequently among the expats who commute to work and I thought it was a brilliant piece of technology. It comes with weeks’ long worth of battery and thousands of books titles can be browsed for free or bought for a minimal sum and they can be read almost immediately! That’s like the best thing a bookworm like me can ask for to keep me company for those long commutes to work without worrying about the weight of the next book that I want to lug to work. On top of that, there’s an in-built dictionary. Enough said already!


Lorna Jane Gymwear!

To ensure my gym sessions not get wasted, I need these LJ wear as they have only recently began shipment to Singapore from Australia all thanks to Zalora. For now, their collection with Zalora is a tad bit limited but I know in time, they will have a greater collection. You just have to wait it out for awhile till the Singapore market gets wind of these ultra cool and motivating gymwear! A bigger budget to spend on me? Here’s an alternative:


Heh, mainly because their compression series are the best in the market so far and yes, best in the market means a bigger price tag! 🙂


Sexy seamless underthings for work use, ideally is VS.

It has come to my attention that when I was chucking out my wardrobe for one of those I-feel-like-throwing-away-rarely-used-clothes day, I have an awful stash of lacy bras and thongs but the seamless bras are close to non-existent! I have a certain weakness for all things lacy and tiny but this has proved to be a difficult thing to do considering that I wear formal clothes everyday at work. Imagine wearing a crisp white shirt and what peeks underneath is a seductive black lacy bra… Total fashion faux pas right! Oh well, work requires that I remain presentable and not trashy. After all, I am in the corporate line so this is a fabulous excuse to get me some sexy underthings!  PS: I have included the site for direct perusal!



It is no secret that I have the smelliest feet in the family mainly because my sweat glands are so active especially in such a humid country like Singapore. I would definitely need breathable shoes from all the walking and I am keen to try those alleviated pumps so that I can tower over the average girls in Singapore. Heh!


As I write the lines for this post, we are inching closer to the fasting month and also, my birthday month. As most of my friends already know, I always set up dares / challenges on the days leading up to my birthday to challenge myself out of my comfort zone ever since I was 15. In all honesty, I have not completed my 25th birthday challenge as aside from being swamped with work and family, I have yet to overcome the trypanophobia that I have. Nevetheless, I look forward to seeing my skin get pierced and blood extracted (hopefully real soon!) and complete that mission to donate blood.

On another note, I have decided to attempt a whole new set of goals for 26th birthday and that is to purchase and complete the entire 4 month long program from Kayla Itsines ‘s (@kaylaitsines) cool Bikini Body Guide program!


I guess every since my recurring ankle injury two years ago, I have been more conscious of the efforts that I put in for my health and fitness and this would be a good transition and goal to commit to for the long-run. Another motivation that I have is my late father, I don’t want to go through what he went through during his life as I know it was a tough way to survive with bone and blood cancer raging all of your insides. It is painful and if there is a way that I can care for my body now and nourish it with the best nutrients that I can find, I would do exactly that. My action to be lean and healthy doesn’t stemmed from vanity. My motivation to change for the better is the result of seeing how the remaining years of our lives can be shortened just because we don’t take active steps to lead a healthier life when we are at our prime.

Here’s hoping for greater things to come and an even healthier, leaner me to see in the next few months!


Girl on Fire.


When I was growing up, there was always one day in a year that I always look forward to. That day happens to be my birthday. Not many people share the same sentiments as I do but coming from a childhood whereby I had to go through bad days – like those days where I was the “toy” being pulled apart by my biological & adoptive parents – has made me resolute that no matter how ugly, sad, miserable my other 364 days in a year was, I always strive to let 5th July be the happiest day of my life every year.

When I was young, it was much easier to do all that. With my parents doting on me – I was the youngest & the only girl in the family – 5th July every year was always memorable with those cake-cutting, picture-taking, presents and whatnots. I don’t remember asking for grand birthdays, the only grandest birthday I’ve had was on my 1st birthday whereby my cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents and close relatives gathered to celebrate at my late grandmother’s home. That was the only one I vividly remember being exceptionally big in my opinion.

Other birthdays were muted and reserved only for the immediate family. I enjoy those private, intimate parties more than the grand ones as I prefer being in the limelight when I’m in the company of the ones closest to me. As I grew older and my parents shifted the breadwinner responsibilities to my brothers & I, my birthday became a slightly more expensive affair as my brothers would take the family out to celebrate my birthday as they know how it meant to me and of course, even if I don’t blow candles on my birthday cake, I am glad to be able to get a collective birthday song from them while I slice a birthday cake. I dare say, that is the moment I look forward to all the time.

As I grew older and have boyfriends involved in my birthdays, the family tone down their involvement by giving me the liberty to celebrate with my then-boyfriends first before I celebrate with them. (How can I not be thankful for having such a wonderful & understanding family?)

I guess the grandest birthday I’ve ever had with my then-boyfriends would that be with Izzac when I celebrated my 18th birthday. He lavished me with plenty of gifts that were over-flowing from his car boot! Not saying that I am boasting it now but for a split second, it felt as though there is someone outside of my family who knows how important 5th July meant to me; and I truly appreciated it as I remembered him getting me 18 gifts to signify my 18th birthday and they all meant the world to me as most of them revolved around Happy House ( as he knows how I adore them (even till now!). I remembered on my 18th, Maris Stella Djuli also giving me two G-strings in a Victoria Secret box! Cheeky but I loved it! I had many presents and even though 7 years has passed, I still recall the memory fondly as I have the photos. That was also the year that I received 3 birthday cakes, blew 3 different cakes & be lucky enough to wish three times in a year.

Another vivid memory was my 21st whereby I was granted an opportunity of a lifetime to celebrate my birthday in the company of sharks and sting rays in the Underwater World. I celebrate my birthday differently each year, with each year being more memorable than the next.

Moving on over the years, I always instill this belief that whoever I celebrate my birthday with, he would know what I yearn for in a birthday. I never asked for a grand affair. Just a moment in my life for that particular year, that the significant other treats me like a princess. No need for an expensive dinner or a limousine ride around town if you can’t afford it. Just something small yet priceless; just a memory to last me a lifetime.

It can be a cheap-ass cake from the neighborhood bakery with one puny candle. It can be a meringue cake with the number of years I turn for that year.

Anything within your means so long as it is a birthday cake.

Even a slice would do me just fine. Just let me blow the freaking candle for once in a year, on a momentous July 5th and I will be greatly appreciative.

When I was single, I used to buy a slice of cake every year that I celebrate alone and still blow it myself as I know that even though I don’t have any Significant Other to buy me a cake for, I care about myself enough to make myself happy.

Maybe I should do that now.

More so since someone said this comment which stung me deep, “No need for birthday cake okay?”

For that moment in my life, I think and believe that you don’t know me. You may not be the sort who celebrates your birthdays unlike me. But it doesn’t mean that I would want to celebrate it the way that you always do. It’s the third year running I am celebrating my birthday without a cake. Why do I subject myself to hope that others will give me a birthday cake?

5th July is & will always be my day.

I don’t care even if the world crumbles tomorrow, all that I want is a cake on my birthday.

Every year, for the rest of my life.

With or without you in it.

A birthday cake is nothing much is it? You don’t need to be Einstein to get me a birthday cake.

The Daily Rant

I’m not looking for a cure for Daddy’s illness as I know there’s no known drugs which can completely cure multiple myeloma. However, any information is good information as it’ll bring me closer to understanding the condition and how to react to it. His illness has left me numb on most days that sometimes I wonder if all these things prove too hard to bear, will I actually end up crumbling and falling down on my feet? Everyday I pray, that it will never happen as I don’t wish for Daddy to see my tears. But at the end of every night before I go to sleep, I always say a silent prayer that I’ll get to see him up and running the next morning. Not literally, but oh you get what I mean yes?

His condition has increasingly evolved me into a different person. Like what I was telling Boo last night, ask me what’s my goal when I was 20, it would sound something like this,

“A career woman who strives to climb the corporate ladder with no room for love or much social life as she’s busy chasing her dreams and dollars so that she can retire comfortably at 30.”

As me now as I go from 23 going on 24 what’s my dream, it’ll sound something like this,

“I want a career yes, but let it be fulfilling enough that I am able to balance my family, my friends, my commitment to my career and still have enough time for myself to pursue the things that I want.”

In this mad-paced lifestyle of a Singaporean life, who on Earth can get a work-life balance if they plough through the hours endlessly at work, right? Well I’ve decided that as much as I love my highly paid job in the tourism and hospitality sector and the big bucks it brings me monthly, I’d rather take a job which requires I serve a shorter working hours and forge a closer bond to my family as no amount of money in the bank can compensate that lost time I missed with my family.

I guess like what the adage says, age does wisen you up and in my case, it sure has indefinitely. I’ve cleaned up my act, stayed away from alcohol and unnecessary late-nights just to wake up bright and early for breakfast with the parents. I’ve even mellowed to reducing my outings to only if it’s necessary to go out. And on top of that, I’m blessed with the sweetest love God has granted me as without his never-ending support, I would’ve fallen apart long, long ago and get myself checked into an asylum for the mental patients. Of course, the network of supportive friends I will give up anything for also made me feel so immensely thankful, sometimes I feel that I’ve not thanked Him enough for all these blessings.

I love you; each and every single one of you who’ve shaped me to who I am now, thank you for playing a part in shaping my life, my values and my soul in this world.

KONY 2012

For each and everyone of us who dreams of changing the world, the time can’t come any sooner.

Pledge your support, buy a bracelet & kit or donate a few dollars every month in support of TRI.

There’s more to life in this world than brutality, child soldiers and child sex slaves.

Leap Year’s Nostalgia

… and I gladly, did.

Sweet, awesome, out-of-this-world, memorable and romantic.

Totally worth waiting up super damn bloody early to spend it in an unconventional way. He called it  Team Awesome Time, a Leap Year special episode to only be reignited again, Insha Allah four years down the road until the end of time.

Hearts to the love 🙂

Paradise Island

Now that I am back in this bustling metropolis, I find myself keep dreaming of going back to the islands and lose myself over and over again. Till the end of time perhaps? What naysayers say is indeed true; when you are sick of modern life, go get lost in an island for a good few days and do nothing but stare at greenery and basically, don’t spend the day planning anything at all. Just go with the flow and let nature take you by the reigns and let yourself go drift far, far away.

It’s amazing how much happiness doing exactly just that did to me for the week that I was away.
And then you realise and re-look into everything in your life that used to matter alot, didn’t quite matter at all.

🙂 🙂 🙂