When I was growing up, there was always one day in a year that I always look forward to. That day happens to be my birthday. Not many people share the same sentiments as I do but coming from a childhood whereby I had to go through bad days – like those days where I was the “toy” being pulled apart by my biological & adoptive parents – has made me resolute that no matter how ugly, sad, miserable my other 364 days in a year was, I always strive to let 5th July be the happiest day of my life every year.
When I was young, it was much easier to do all that. With my parents doting on me – I was the youngest & the only girl in the family – 5th July every year was always memorable with those cake-cutting, picture-taking, presents and whatnots. I don’t remember asking for grand birthdays, the only grandest birthday I’ve had was on my 1st birthday whereby my cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents and close relatives gathered to celebrate at my late grandmother’s home. That was the only one I vividly remember being exceptionally big in my opinion.
Other birthdays were muted and reserved only for the immediate family. I enjoy those private, intimate parties more than the grand ones as I prefer being in the limelight when I’m in the company of the ones closest to me. As I grew older and my parents shifted the breadwinner responsibilities to my brothers & I, my birthday became a slightly more expensive affair as my brothers would take the family out to celebrate my birthday as they know how it meant to me and of course, even if I don’t blow candles on my birthday cake, I am glad to be able to get a collective birthday song from them while I slice a birthday cake. I dare say, that is the moment I look forward to all the time.
As I grew older and have boyfriends involved in my birthdays, the family tone down their involvement by giving me the liberty to celebrate with my then-boyfriends first before I celebrate with them. (How can I not be thankful for having such a wonderful & understanding family?)
I guess the grandest birthday I’ve ever had with my then-boyfriends would that be with Izzac when I celebrated my 18th birthday. He lavished me with plenty of gifts that were over-flowing from his car boot! Not saying that I am boasting it now but for a split second, it felt as though there is someone outside of my family who knows how important 5th July meant to me; and I truly appreciated it as I remembered him getting me 18 gifts to signify my 18th birthday and they all meant the world to me as most of them revolved around Happy House (http://www.happyhouse.com.au/) as he knows how I adore them (even till now!). I remembered on my 18th, Maris Stella Djuli also giving me two G-strings in a Victoria Secret box! Cheeky but I loved it! I had many presents and even though 7 years has passed, I still recall the memory fondly as I have the photos. That was also the year that I received 3 birthday cakes, blew 3 different cakes & be lucky enough to wish three times in a year.
Another vivid memory was my 21st whereby I was granted an opportunity of a lifetime to celebrate my birthday in the company of sharks and sting rays in the Underwater World. I celebrate my birthday differently each year, with each year being more memorable than the next.
Moving on over the years, I always instill this belief that whoever I celebrate my birthday with, he would know what I yearn for in a birthday. I never asked for a grand affair. Just a moment in my life for that particular year, that the significant other treats me like a princess. No need for an expensive dinner or a limousine ride around town if you can’t afford it. Just something small yet priceless; just a memory to last me a lifetime.
It can be a cheap-ass cake from the neighborhood bakery with one puny candle. It can be a meringue cake with the number of years I turn for that year.
Anything within your means so long as it is a birthday cake.
Even a slice would do me just fine. Just let me blow the freaking candle for once in a year, on a momentous July 5th and I will be greatly appreciative.
When I was single, I used to buy a slice of cake every year that I celebrate alone and still blow it myself as I know that even though I don’t have any Significant Other to buy me a cake for, I care about myself enough to make myself happy.
Maybe I should do that now.
More so since someone said this comment which stung me deep, “No need for birthday cake okay?”
For that moment in my life, I think and believe that you don’t know me. You may not be the sort who celebrates your birthdays unlike me. But it doesn’t mean that I would want to celebrate it the way that you always do. It’s the third year running I am celebrating my birthday without a cake. Why do I subject myself to hope that others will give me a birthday cake?
5th July is & will always be my day.
I don’t care even if the world crumbles tomorrow, all that I want is a cake on my birthday.
Every year, for the rest of my life.
With or without you in it.
A birthday cake is nothing much is it? You don’t need to be Einstein to get me a birthday cake.