ENFJ in General.

ENFJs are natural-born leaders, full of passion and charisma. Forming around two percent of the population, they are oftentimes our politicians, our coaches and our teachers, reaching out and inspiring others to achieve and to do good in the world. With a natural confidence that begets influence, ENFJs take a great deal of pride and joy in guiding others to work together to improve themselves and their community.

People are drawn to strong personalities, and ENFJs radiate authenticity, concern and altruism, unafraid to stand up and speak when they feel something needs to be said. They find it natural and easy to communicate with others, especially in person, and their Intuitive (N) trait helps ENFJs to reach every mind, be it through facts and logic or raw emotion. ENFJs easily see people’s motivations and seemingly disconnected events, and are able to bring these ideas together and communicate them as a common goal with an eloquence that is nothing short of mesmerizing.

The interest ENFJs have in others is genuine, almost to a fault – when they believe in someone, they can become too involved in the other person’s problems, place too much trust in them. Luckily, this trust tends to be a self-fulfilling prophesy, as ENFJs’ altruism and authenticity inspire those they care about to become better themselves. But if they aren’t careful, they can overextend their optimism, sometimes pushing others further than they’re ready or willing to go.

Everything you do right now ripples outward and affects everyone. Your posture can shine your heart or transmit anxiety. Your breath can radiate love or muddy the room in depression. Your glance can awaken joy. Your words can inspire freedom. Your every act can open hearts and minds.

David Deida

 

ENFJs are vulnerable to another snare as well: they have a tremendous capacity for reflecting on and analyzing their own feelings, but if they get too caught up in another person’s plight, they can develop a sort of emotional hypochondria, seeing other people’s problems in themselves, trying to fix something in themselves that isn’t wrong. If the ENFJ gets to a point where they are held back by limitations someone else is experiencing, it can hinder their ability to see past the dilemma and be of any help at all. When this happens, it’s important for ENFJs to pull back and use that self-reflection to distinguish between what they really feel, and what is a separate issue that needs to be looked at from another perspective.

ENFJs are genuine, caring people who talk the talk and walk the walk, and nothing makes them happier than leading the charge, uniting and motivating their team with infectious enthusiasm. ENFJs are passionate altruists, sometimes even to a fault, and they are unlikely to be afraid to take the slings and arrows while standing up for the people and ideas they believe in. It is no wonder that many famous ENFJs are US Presidents – this personality type wants to lead the way to a brighter future, whether it’s by leading a nation to prosperity, or leading their little league softball team to a hard-fought victory.

Most typical ENFJ careers share one key attribute—they focus on making other people happy. ENFJs are usually very warm, sociable, and altruistic, and they have many viable choices when it comes to choosing the career that is best for them. We will list some of the most common roles below, but please feel free to drop us a message if you have any comments or ideas.

Let us start examining ENFJ career choices by stating the somewhat obvious fact that ENFJs are sincerely interested in other people and try to do their best to help them. On top of this, people with the ENFJ personality type tend to have extraordinary social and networking skills—it is quite common for an ENFJ to be “that person who knows everybody.” ENFJs truly shine in customer-relations careers or roles where they need to be dealing with other people on a daily basis. They can be brilliant sales representatives, advertising consultants, or HR administrators.

Next, ENFJs are usually quite sensitive and even somewhat idealistic. This is a double-edged sword, as the same sensitivity draws ENFJs toward careers that reward high emotional intelligence; on the other hand, ENFJs are very vulnerable to criticism and should stay away from stressful careers. Some of the ENFJ careers to avoid include finance (especially stock trading), law enforcement, corporate management, emergency personnel, medicine, and the military.

People with this personality type are also really creative, organized, and honest. This makes them excellent psychologists, event coordinators, or politicians. (There are some honest politicians in the world!) Also, one of the best ENFJ careers can be found in writing; however, ENFJs tend to approach this from a journalistic rather than book-writing perspective as such a career allows them to leverage their people skills.

Finally, ENFJs love new challenges and the thrill they get from helping other people. Consequently, many ENFJs are found in “altruistic” careers, e.g., social or religious work, teaching, or counseling. However, it should also be noted that ENFJs need constant approval from other people in order to feel satisfied and happy. If this is not forthcoming, the ENFJ may burn out very quickly and move to another career path or project.

EDITOR’S NOTE: I am glad to have pursued a hobby in writing and also dabbled in event planning but the one that is giving me the most joy now is writing in WordPress! 🙂

Advertisements

A Birthday Letter from Yesteryear

I was purging out old letters from my mailbox and I chanced upon this birthday letter sent by an old suitor (a good few years back) who by far has the most moving words I can only imagine. Wherever you are, I wish you all the kindest the world has to offer you dear one.

*

Dear Madam,                                                                                                        July 4, 2011

I most sincerely wish not to have embarrassed you as such before but I must have

your attention drawn. My feelings will not be suppressed nor will they be laughed at.

I assure you Madam, that I will bow and take my leave with much unsupported

willingness immediately, after I see you open this humbled letter.

 

I see I am not a gentleman of your exquisite taste nor am I a man worth your time but I

am a man honest with himself. I will not stand by and watch you walk away with accusing

me as a horrible fiend when you believe the lie as the truth. I know not how your community

see me as, nor do I care for what they see in me. Your opinions of my conceitedness and

arrogance is by far the greatest flaws I see in me. I cannot thank you more for pointing that

ugly truth of my imperfection to me. However much I hate that side, I cannot simply discard

them for they are what that makes me human.

 

If I may be so bold as to ask for your hand a second time, will you grace me a desirable

answer or would you turn your head in scorn? However, worry no Madam for I will never

ask again. You have my word. I have never felt this way about a woman nor have I felt such

strong feelings since the massacre of my family. I am a beast that  was shaped from the

cruelties of life and the sneering scornful community of the ton. Oh yes, a beast! A fiend! A

horrible arrogant man! That’s who and what I am or so the society believe. Now, believe as

you like for I have defended my honor to my best capabilities.

 

You however, are a beauty to behold. A blossoming rose in a garden of thorns. Graceful

and beautiful… Grace and femininity, you symbolize them perfectly. No, I do not flatter nor

do I praise but I speak the truth as I see it.

 

Forgive me if I have been brash and foul in this letter but I know not the flowery language

to woo you well. I am not a man of communication nor am I a man of such eloquence. I

understand your fury for having been proposed by such un-mannered man.

 

But I pray and wish you the best in life for perhaps you will meet a man of your taste. A man

of your fairy tale, a prince charming, who commands grace and eloquence unlike me who

commands the silent thunder, power and loyalty.

 

God bless you in good health.

 

I bid you adieu, Madam. Goodbye forever.

 

 

A Word That Best Describes You :)

Independent: “If you want something done, do it yourself,” is your refrain. Being free and in control of your own destiny is more important to you than anything.

goldfish jumping out of the water

There is absolutely nothing more than a streak of independence that is deeply-embedded within me that screams for freedom from as long as I can remember.

What’s yours? Hit http://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifestyle/word-best-describes-find-1-minute.html to find out!

WEEK 3: Self Love & Worthiness

Day 11:

Forgiveness. It’s time to start forgiving yourself for mistakes you’ve made, ‘wrong’ decisions you’ve taken and ‘right’ ones you haven’t. If you want to be happy and more energetic, you’ve got to DUMP the baggage you’re carrying around!

Lighten the load on your back, neck, shoulders and heart as you let go of anything that’s not serving you. It doesn’t belong in your bright, gorgeous, happy and fulfilling life 🙂

What will you forgive yourself for and move on from today? 

Be gentle with yourself – this is NOT an invitation to beat yourself up, it’s an invitation to free yourself. Confidence comes from seeing mistakes and failures as a part of life, and not making them mean something negative about *you* as a person.

I’m excited to see what you’re saying goodbye to so please do share 🙂

Forgiveness

There are definitely many mistakes that I have made throughout the course of the twenty over years of my life and most of them led me to where I am now.  Among those mistakes that I have made, they have to revolve around my wrong choices in choosing a partner or what my girlfriends call it, Mr Right Now.

I had a tumultuous and tempestuous long-term relationship with a schoolmate which ended acrimoniously during my graduation and that had definitely left the greatest impact in my life thus far. It has taught me not to trust others too easily and to never give 100% of my time and effort to one man only until he is the one with whom I will call my husband.

Alas, I am a trusting person. I trust others truly easily so it’s little wonder that I never seemed to learn from that painful chapter in my life. I had sudden but brief exposures to suicide, abuse and also betrayal that I never thought I would actually come out of the chapter alive and virtually unscathed. Thankfully, I have been blessed with a tight knit of friends who have seen me in my biggest ups and greatest downfalls and are not afraid to help me up when the going gets tough.

Many, many failed relationships later, I vowed not to love another man anymore as I fear that another heartbreak will crucify my sanity but I guess my current love managed to overcome that aspect of me. With him (as how I was with my previous ex-boyfriends), I was completely transparent with my past. I told him all the nasty things I have done, all the rebellion inside of me that’s hungry to be set free and also, the hope that by being honest, he would be able to accept me with all of my imperfections. He remained quiet throughout the bouts of episodes that I throw tantrums and confided my deepest secrets. Not once did he questioned my reasons for doing what I did. In fact, he never raised his voice at me. I thought that was weird as I was used to being hurled abuse by the ex-boyfriend that it took a long time to understand that…

It’s okay not to hurt another person verbally or physically. It is the right thing to not lay a hand on anyone. Inflicting pain on another person is downright wrong.

I thought our relationship was destined to doom eventually but… Close to four years of friendship and three years of love later, he still tells me everyday that he loves me unconditionally and that regardless of what mistakes I have done in the past as it doesn’t matter to him. What matters to him is the current me and the future me that he wants to plan a future with. I guess that is where the forgiveness came from.

I learnt to forgive when I was shown the right to forgive myself in the eyes of another and to me, that is the greatest gift I can ask from anyone for myself. Forgiveness for myself is a healing experience. It was a long, long time coming but I am glad I opened myself up to this healing process. It is as though all the negativity and disappointment perish to make way to something greater than holding back. Since my birthday is coming in a few days,  I am going on another path to forgive my past 25 years of mistakes that I have yet to find the time to forgive and heal.

I hope you readers will feel the power that forgiveness has on you.
It truly feels like a miracle.
Good vibes everyday everyone!

🙂

Bucket List of Places to Go!

I would like to add these 19 gorgeous libraries across the world into my bucket list of libraries that I would like to see and visit at least once in my lifetime.

https://sg.news.yahoo.com/photos/gorgeous-libraries-around-the-world-1387793545-slideshow/gorgeous-libraries-from-around-the-world-photo-1386086481374.html

On top of that, granted the luxury of time and excess pockets of money, I would love to visit these beautiful wonders of the world (not in the official list):

https://sg.news.yahoo.com/photos/extraordinary-world-phenomenons-slideshow/lightning-striking-grand-canyon-photo–1618297586.html

And also, a must is to go and visit…

Machu Picchu,

Machu Picchu!

Seychelles,

Seychelles

Hanging Gardens of Babylon,

Hanging Gardens of Babylon

Santorini,

Santorini

Burj Al Arab,

Burj Al Arab

as they have stolen my heart way back when I was studying them in Tourism Geography back in SHATEC. Ideally would be to visit all 21 wonders of the ancient, current and future wonders of the world! Insha Allah, AMIN!

🙂

Father.

In a way the writer in the article below is “relatable” given the similarities in the way we grow up and how we are spending this year’s Father’s Day without our old man celebrating with us as they are busy lapping up the good stuff in Heaven. truthfully-speaking, her experiences strike a cord with me given that both our late fathers are thrifty and the wisest people on Earth.

https://www.linkedin.com/today/post/article/20140612141140-176887622-father-s-day-financial-advice?fromEmail=fromEmail&trk=eml-ced-b-art-M-2-9099547925662416795&midToken=AQGtR8mnjcNLQQ&ut=1zsusQ07jQNmg1

Reading her article makes me miss Papa a fair bit but I know Papa is doing  just fine in Heaven with all his favorite people around. Even the 3 Bujang Lapok bachelors (if you are acutely aware of old-Malaya actors from Jalan Ampas) are in Heaven too so, Heaven is definitely a fun place to be in now.

Bujang Lapok

Missing you always Papa, take care and lots of love from your baby girl.

XX

Forever with You

It may come as a surprise to most of you that I am in a serious relationship with a bloke many years my junior. I hear rumors too that my intention to marry late is because of the need to adapt to a young (future) husband who is not yet matured enough financially to take care of me. In all honesty, finances is a big deal to me as I have been independent since 15 when I got my first ever mobile line. (Trust me, back then I felt like I was already an adult responsible for all my phone bills.) However, the reason why I chose to only settle when I am 30 or so is not because of the finances. I am more than happy to provide for myself and the family when the need arises.

I am thankful I have a wonderful man in my life who understands me and my 1001 personalities and still love me dearly. (I love you too boo.) I do have my doubts when I get ridiculed (sometimes) by people who calls me cougar and cradle-snatcher but for Pete’s sake, I am only 3 years his senior and in no way am I a cradle-snatcher. I am not like 40 and dating a 20 year old man!

I was reading a blog that I follow on WP that led me to this article by a fellow blogger. I read it and can’t help but smile at my worry of being able to fit into the norms of society when I am meant to stand out. Her views on older women marrying younger men was validated by the teachings of Islam.

Our Prophet (SAW) himself married a far older woman Khadijah (RA). Read her article only with an open mind as with a closed mind, there’s only so much that you allow your heart and mind to see:

http://www.patheos.com/blogs/splitthemoon/2014/04/give-muhammad-a-chance/

I’m sticking to my guns. I will marry you when I am 30 and when you’re 27 honey. I am not intending to settle with anyone else and that’s final. You can propose earlier if your finances are right but till then, I don’t mind waiting it out for a lifetime with you boo. Insha Allah He will protect us and our union till that day we are Man and Wife.

🙂

2013 in Review for LBV!

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2013 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

The concert hall at the Sydney Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 8,500 times in 2013. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 3 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report.

Moving On,

Sometimes I forget that I’ve started this site when I was still an incumbent; a mere child trying to be all adult about things. When I read the negative comments that I’ve garnered over the years over some of my (I dare say) controversial posts, I realized how far I have grown over the last 4 years that I penned my thoughts to writing. Funny how when you read what you read last time, you shirk in disbelief at the level of immaturity over some of the most non-significant episodes in my life. For example, my writing on the airline recruitment that I’ve attended over the years.

Gone are the days when I try to be somebody that I am not but also, there a the days that have gone too whereby I learnt to grow up and evolve into a better person this moment on. I shall not delete my controversial posts from yesteryear not to cultivate hate among some of my passionate readers. Instead, I leave them in here so as a reminder to myself on how far I’ve evolved from a then-girl with sky-high levels of insecurity to a woman who embraces her imperfections and accepts the trials and tribulations that God has set aside for me. For my long-time readers, I am sure you are able to see my growth through the years and the pages of my writing and I would like to extend my deepest thanks for sticking by me through them all.

Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I’ll try again tomorrow. – Mary Anne Radmacher.

With much love from me to all of you out there. Have a blessed week ahead while I head off to the gym to exercise those gams that’s been on idle for way too long.

XX

For the Daddy’s Girl

Our fathers may shape our lives very differently but I know we both are on the same page as to how our fathers shaped us into who we are now when the same fathers who were the formidable figures in our lives have changed in retrospect.

Hats off to you girl, we are in this together as I totally can relate to how you feel & Insha Allah, He will protect both our fathers from any more pain or danger.

A Good Samaritan

It is a simple task; would you help change the tyre of a random stranger if you see him / her stranded on the street? The reactions differ greatly between a brunette guy, a blonde woman & a Muslim guy. Watch and get inspired:

Oh stereotypes, they are rampant yet should be eradicated.

MunahHirziOfficial

These two pranksters have gotten me abso hooked with their 10 Dares which leave me in stitches on those boring nights on Youtube.

This particular video showcases Hirzi’s talent in being Leticiacia Fierce and yes, the hottest topic in Singapore at the moment which is about the domestic helpers being debated as to whether they deserve an off day or not.

Seriously people? They are humans too so makes no sense to not allow them to a rest day. If you are in their shoes, will you hope to be granted an off day after working madness taking  charge of household chores for the last six days? One day isn’t that hard right? The house won’t be run over by the moths and fleas and roaches if you don’t clean it up for a day seyy.

The Bully Project

I am a big fan of the Ellen show and truthfully, she brings in plenty of laughs and good memories whenever I think of her. She’s got a very famous parting shot at the end of every show which is,

“.. be kind to one another, good night.”

Her line strikes a familiar chord with me but this particular episode encompasses all that meaning behind the phrase. Take a little bit of your time, no more than 16 minutes to be moved to tears when you hear and witness first-hand what bullying in schools can do to your child, your friend or someone in your life.

In this instance, the boy who was bullied took his own life when the pressures of the bully didn’t cease and now, his family lives to tell the tale of what psychological impact bullying can do to one and one’s family. An early death can be prevented, if more immediate actions were taken to correct those people with tell-tale signs of bullying habits.

Giving birth to a child isn’t easy, give every child the right to live happily, go to school and chase their dreams however big they may be. Don’t live to see another bully terrorize someone in your school as you may never know if that glimpse you see of your friend may just be the last.

The movie will be out in fall 2012, watch it if you can. In fact, you must.

Worthy Worship

To Allah belong the secrets of the heavens and the earth, and to Him the entire matter shall be returned. So worship Him and have trust in Him. Your Lord is not unaware of what you do.

Surah Hud (11:123)